risk and creativity part two (hello vulnerability)

From Birds being stuck on a branch to birds taking flight

  When I had first started thinking about risk and creativity, I wasn't thinking about painting my next painting on a Sunday service in front of my somewhat large church.  This was a whole new risk for me to take that really opened me up to vulnerability.

Even big blobs of nothing can turn into something beautiful

My first thought was everyone will see all my mistakes, all the things that I paint over, and all the colours I put together that don't work.  Ahh!!  And what if my painting really dosen't amount to anything?  Visions of a big colourful blob came to mind.

One thing I have learned to enjoy while painting, is the journey.  Even if the painting isn't looking like I had hoped or things get painted over, it is a process.   I  have found that there is value in sharing my mistakes and the paint over scenes. I love to see something that may look like a mess turn into something amazing!  So if that is what I truly enjoy, then  here was my chance to share the journey with others. YIKES!

Without vulnerability, others would miss a big part of my creativity.  Being vulnerable was allowing me to share my journey of painting with others.  It creates growth in us, and I believe being vulnerable is being brave.  It also revealed some things to me about my heart.  That as much as I want to paint from what is inside of me, there is still is a desire to paint things that others want.  This isn't all bad.  It's totally understandable to want others to like what you're doing.  But if it hinders what is really inside of me because of fear that others won't like what is in me creatively, then I won't come to my full potential creatively.  It left me with a very real question.  Am I trying to find my worth in what I am doing?

Me being vunerable with my painting

So the journey continues and I do say hello to vulnerability,  being real with where I am and what I can do creatively.  Through all of this I will say I had fun, even though I may not have been as free as what I would have been behind closed doors in my studio.  I enjoyed sharing what I was doing with friends, family, and some strangers.  I couldn't help but feel a sense of joy as I stepped into the world of risk and vulnerbility.  BTW,  I got asked to paint again, but this time I am asking others to join me in the journey of vulnerability.